ADD ON STORY!!!

[AVRILROCKS!!!]

(Please no endings. You can't make her go out with you or do strange things :D) (scene: Avril sits in her hotel room, getting ready for her performance at 1pm. The guys are in the room across the hall.) Avril: Hmm... which should I wear? *looks in her closet and pulls out a pair of loose, black pants and a matching tank top and tie. Puts them on and races into the guys' room. Everyone is still sleeping. Avril leaps onto the bed and pokes everyone.* Avril: WAKIE!!! *the boys mumble to themselves and slowly climb out of bed*

[AVRILROCKS!!!]

(theres a muffled voice at the door) Voice 1: Are you sure this is the one? Voice 2: Yea, I saw her stuff in that other room. It's empty though. Voice 1: Oh, this is so awesome! Who's gonna knock? Avril (to boys): You guys hear people out there? Charlie (very excited): Sounds like fans!!! *Avril opens the door a crack. Two girls scream and make their way into the room.* Girl 1: You guys rock! Girl 2: We saw Avril run across the hall and we were like, OMG! We didn't know we were in the same hotel as you! The guys whisper to eachother: What about us?

[Greyjaei]

The fans come and go. Being more estatic and having more love for Avril then when they first came. Impatiently waiting for the boys to get ready for another day Avril turns on the Tv. Flipping through the channels, she notices something.. All the channels are broadcasting a Urgent News Report. While many of the channels have gone blank. Her brow furrows as she switchs back to one of the working channels and listens to the Urgent message being broadcasted.

"Bzz..tsst...Communications... tsssss....Being...ssssss....Jammed...cesssssss...U nder....Bzt...Attack...bzzzzzzz...Alien lifeforms....tssss....Cities.."

Avrils eyes light up at the news. Finally! a little break from the usual! Running back to her room she opens her suitcase. Rummaging around she finds what she was looking for.. A black leather case, with a combonation lock, with the name Avril stiched on the outsite.. Opening the case a smile comes across her face. Reaching with both of her hands Avril pulls out her pride and joy. Some Platinum-Plated Dual Bretta's. She gives each a quick kiss and loads each with a full clip. Rummaging around some more she finds a holster for the guns and straps them on. Whistling a merry tune to herself she skips out the to the stairs and proceedes to the hotel lobby.

While Avril was arming herself ,3 of the boys had fallen back asleep and the other one, Evan, was just finishing brushing his teeth. Evan came out of the bathroom and saw what was on the Television. Watching the report for a couple minutes he shrugs, Yawns, and goes back to sleep.

<thus ends the prolouge>

[AVRILROCKS!!!]

*Avril wanders around outside (still in hotel property), following a trail of her stolen ties* She checks her watch...* Avril: 10 o'clock! I gotta be back for the show at 1! *hums a tune she picked up from a mystery movie she watched last night. A little flash of green cuts her off. She aims and...* Avril: shit! I forgot to reload this thing! *pauses* Ah, screw it! *chases after the ugly little man and strangles it* Avril: Gimmie back my stuff! *eventually, the little man gives in and gives her it's stash of her clothing* Green man: *shrugging* My friend's got your pants :mrgreen: *After giving it one last punch, Avril leaves the little man on the cement and follows the directions she managed to beat out of the little thief. She finds their base and looks around. She notices a green figure (carrying a bag of her stuff) and tackles it.* Avril: Each one has sentimental value! *she continues to beat the limp body on the ground. After she collects all her clothing, she drags the little man back to it's friend* Avril: Where do you guys come from anyway? GreenMan1: We're the (only) members of the B****ney Fan Club! *The two girls get out of their costumes mumbling unhappily* Kid 2: B****ney is the leader, she told us that we have to steal your clothes if we wanted to stay in her fan club! She is planning to burn your clothes in hopes to stop you from being better than her!!! Avril *looks disgusted*: Tell B****ney to get a life! (Avril is back at the hotel room, her clothes are safetly in her closet) The guys: So B****ney S***rs sent her only 2 members to steal your clothes to burn? Avril: Yea! Well, whatever... We gotta go. The concert starts in 2 hours and we gotta be there now. *everyone grabs their skateboards and leave the room*

[jonah hardcore]

as they walk down the hallway a faint bass boom approaches. louder it grows with each step. as they round coner after corner the hall becomes crowded with screaming girls. a figure in the center motions for silence. all that can be seen of the figure is its back. slowly it turns around revealing its hideous maybeline(or whatever product) face! Britney bellows out a high c bringing everyone to their knees - the only ones left standing being our hero, avril, and britney queen of refuse. as she continues the shreek avril pulls up the finger and and snarls "shut the pie hole." in a satanic voice spears rebukes the hero: "i shall take you down with my size quadrupile d life rafts that get in the way too much." avril replies "you forgot i have to guns... hahahaaa. im gonna lay down shots non-stop til i see your monkey ass drop." CRACK, BOOM, BOOM, BOOM... Avril breaths in a deep sigh as she is ripped from the nightmare. "hey mx dumb face, were trying to sleep, turn of the idiot box," evan groans rolling over on the floor. avril looks at the clock; it says 5 am..."only a dream! fudge, no more taco bell chalupas at 11 at night anymore.... its a damn cold night," she mumbles as she pulls the covers over her head, "fame can be a bitch."

[AVRILROCKS!!!]

(Avril and her band arrive at the concert hall. They enter the stars secret entrance. An scheduled interviewer is waiting for them.) Interviewer: Hey, Avril! Over here! *Avil follows the woman into a room, while the guys wait outside. They sit down at a table. The woman introduces herself then she pulls out her booklet and the interview begins.* Woman: How do you feel when people call you a pop singer? Avril: It bugs me when people say that i'm not punk. I never stated that I was! People just like to assume things. *the woman nods and scribbles down a messy quote in her book" Woman: There are a lot of girls that are dressing in tank tops and ties now. Avril (cuts her off): If they want to dress like me, then fine. I think its funny though. *smiles* *the woman jots down some more stuff*

[Greyjaei]

As the interview progresses with the same boring and unimaginative questions, Avril starts to drift off to sleep. Once Avril's eyes were half-closed though, the interviewer lunged at her! Quick as lightning Avril jumps out of the way, and the interviewer hits the chair and tumbles away with the chair in tow. Avril now watched the interviewer as she slowly stood up, picked up her notepad, and dusted herself off..
With a smile the interviewer looks at Avril, then deftly removes a pen from her pocket. Hefting it a few times she nods then flings it towards Avril, a dagger for the heart. But Avril's learnt a few things from her days in the Himilayla's, sutdying to become a monk.. Jumping up in the air Avril twirled around and back-kicked the pen back at the interviewer. The pen cut through the air and hit the interviewer between the eyes, exploding in a gross flower of ink. Skrieking about her beautifull face, the interviewer ran away. Never to be seen by Avril again.
Whistleing a tune from her next album, Avril Lavigne went to the snack bar to grab a niamo bar.

[Greyjaei]

Finishing a niamo bar. Avril picked up another, took out her lighter and put the torch to it. She then threw the flaming Niamo bar unto the snack bar, turning it into a rageing inferno of flames.

Just as the flames were at their peak, the concert producer came into the room, glanceing at the snack bar. He told Avril the concert was going to start soon and that she should make her way to the staging area. Nodding avril ate the marshmellow she had toasted and went to meet her band.

Seeing her band up ahead Avril ducked into the shadows. Slowly sneaking towards them she pounced on Evan, nearly knocking him to the ground. After a brief struggle Avril pinned Evan and made him say uncle. Giveing Evan a tough poke in the ribs she got up and raise her arms in the air, performing a little cheer. Still grinning at Evan when the producer came and tell them it was time for there gig, she straightened her hair and went to destroy some more images.

[jonah hardcore]

as they walked to the stage evan complained about his recent ribs poke. "seriously i cant play now," he groaned. "what the mother eff are we gonna do home boy," the manager quized. "i know!" screech mark, "i saw this once on a show about the who!" walking out to the stage, a light was shone on the worried drummer. "attention. the show cant go on unless someone who knows the friggin songs on geetar can play," he spat into the microphone. "ahhhhhh," jonah screamed as he burst onto the stage, "let me show you mad skill homie." starting the set the band immediately relized that he was the worst untalented piece of crap guitar player ever in history. punching him out, even tore the guitar from his chest. "ack!"jonah scream because the strap just ripped out one of his nipple rings. "serves you, lousy mother fudger," evan proclamed, "now lets start the show..."

[Greyjaei]

After that brutal perforance.. Evan was pelted off the stage with olives. He ran off the stage screaming, "My beautiful eyes... My eyesss!!" Because, an olive had hit him on the eye, then bounced and hit his other eye.. (It's possible, I've tested this many times!)

Then a lightbulb lite in Avril's Head!, "I've got it!" she yelled. I'll get my magical Gremlin friend to play the guitar. Hearing this everyone in the crowd started to murmer and the band was giving her side glances.. For they could all tell she wasn't jokeing. But sure enough, after Avril got on the cell phone, a little gremlin hopped onto the stage, with a miniture Guitar case. Giving Avril the "Rock on" symbol he pulled out his guitar, a sleek neon green masterpiece, and hooked it up. Since he was a Gremlin his guitar was very small, so naturally everyone started to laugh.. With evil Gremlin look on his face he took the microphone and screamed, "It's not the size that matters *censored*." Then he stuck some cords.

Never has there been a greater preformance by Avril and her band then the night the Gremlin Rawked.

[jonah hardcore]

after that performace, evan went into seclusion, under the stage of that very auditorium... mangled and scary from the olive attack. he planned for a return one day where he could be accepted and win over his ultimate bride... "bluestar."

[Greyjaei]

<Grey stumbles in with a bottle of wine, with a heavy slur he starts shouting jibberish.. "Has Sabbb!!! Sllla wackkka Mak" then falls into a bathtub and takes a catnap>
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For many years Evan stayed withen the auditorium. Quietly playing his Kabab and waiting for "bluestar". How he ended his dream is yet another story entirly though, and is not followed withen these verses.

Now when Avril finished that preformance she decided it was time, time to complete her master plan. O yes, her master plan. It seemed to Avril that throughout her life all she ever worked on was her master plan. Even if, she didn't know she was. Her message would be heard, would be answered.

Alone and in her hotel room, Avril started her laptop, but something inside her told her not to journy down that path. So, closing the laptop she got out her notebook and her favorite pen. Shutting her eyes with more than a normal amount of force Avril sat on her bed and proped the notebook againest her legs. Sighing a sigh that would have softened the hardest hearts, she began to write.

In those pages were the beginnings of a Perfect Diamond, with edges that bit the deepest heart.

Hours later, or was it days? Did she begin that day, or was it begun many years ago. She couldn't remember, time was lost in this part of life. How could any rules define the infinite.

With a trembling hand Avril lay her notebook on the side table. Then with a smile not seen by many, that lite up her eyes like no photo could ever hope to capture. She lay down herself, and quickly fell into a deep, and peacefull sleep.

[jonah hardcore]

deeper and deeper she fell into slumber until all of a sounden a voice yelled out, "whats it gonna be, eh? in and out of institutions all your lives?"

was it real? was it a dream, she was not sure. suddenly she realized was adorned her body - a white jumpsuit with her pants tucked into her boots, a derby upon her skull, and cuff link that resembelled bloody eyeballs. the dream flashed to a desolate theater, 3 girls in similar outfits joined her. "lets get em boys," a shadow called. "well if it isnt stinking fat billy boy. why dont you come over her and get a shot in the yarbles," she answered. as the horny young men charged towards her... "ahhhhhhhhh!" she screamed as she awoke to the classic representation of a clockwork orange (stanley kubrick). "shiznat that was odd.... wait a milanky bit, im going to get some milk vellcet and then get some of the ultraviolence.....ahhhh," she awoke form the second dream, "thats mad craziness." the sequence was over and the clock flashed 4:30 am... she picked up the notebook scribbled down some random words then headed for the john.....



Last edited by my name is jonah at Oct 15 2002, 06:45 PM

[jonah hardcore]

the seat was cold as she lay the cheeks upon it. just as she began the "office work," phili the little irish wonder burst into the darkened aboad.
"well gee willikers you pleasant little candanian dish," he slurred with the combination of jet lag and exasperation.
"aw shit," she paused noticing a pun, "im sick of using this erin go braugh whooping stick all the time."
just as she sinished her sentence she removed a short green and yellow club from behind the bowl. with a swift motion she swung, hititng the poor boy in the right arm, seriously.
"whaaaaa," he screeched as he gripped the wound dangling extremity.
the whimper sent guilt shooting through avril's heart and she approach the red headed adolescant slowly.
"dude, you can sneek up on people like that homes," she defended herself, "im sorry lets get something for that."
she retrieved some ice from the hotel fridge and placed it on his arm. but as she turned around to go sit down, she heard a distinct "shhhhinnng." she turned to catch the boy with scissors ready to mangle the songtress' beautiful long locks. avril burst from the room and over to the wild and crazy matt's. (on a side note, he answered the door in a pink lined leaopard print thong)
"errrrr," he groaned.
"some crazy mofo is in my room you gotsta help," avril threw out.
"ummmerrrrr,"he replied.
"ok ill just hang here"

[Sparkplug]

i dont get this story anymore. i was gonna add on, but...

[narrator]

Jonah's been watching too much Kubrick

[Sparkplug]

? hmm?

[narrator]

Stanley....the directer....ahhhh, this baby's wasted on ya

[Sparkplug]

ok :)

[jonah hardcore]

Jonah's been watching too much Kubrick

refers to the fact that stanely kubrick made a movie after anthonty burgess's novel a clockwork orange

but continue the story please

[Sparkplug]

i would if i knew what was happening :)