As Lovers Go

[TelescopeEyes]

I've started writing this new Fic, this chapters ok I guess. I'll still be working on finishing my last one *This Girl*. Just bare with me. I hope you guys like it.

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Chapter 1 - *Anywhere with you*

"I'll stop the world and melt with you, You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time. There's nothing you and I won't do I'll stop the world and melt with you"

Everything feels perfect today. Evan’s managed to tear himself away from the music store and he’s just put his arms around me, placing a gentle and sincere kiss on the forehead. I love it when he cares enough to do that all the time, and when he doesn’t I miss it. It hasn’t felt this good to be Avril Lavigne for a long time. Evan and I are out for the day, and he always knows how to make me feel special. It’s thanks to him that I’ve pulled through so many things. He doesn’t know how much I owe him. Best friends are amazing, especially if it’s a guy. I wouldn’t have healed or felt fixed without Evan holding me, letting me cry into his chest, letting me unfold and come undone.

Life has been pretty hectic, with Jesse’s departure. Me and Jesse we dated and it ended on good terms, no bitter words or hatred. Well, not on my part. There just wasn’t anything special between us, it didn’t fulfil me enough. I love a guy who’s not afraid to cry with me and talk about how he feels or where he wants our future to go. I love having a boyfriend, cut out the downfalls and skip past the goodbyes and everything runs smoothly. I guess that’s why when me and Jesse happened, that I let myself fall straight into his arms. It happened so fast, one moment he was a shoulder to cry on and a brother type figure and then before I knew it, he was kissing me, caressing me and opening a whole new world for us.

The course of love never did run smoothly. Don't get me wrong, I did like Jesse.. but being around Matt, Charlie, Evan and Jesse almost 24/7. It was obvious to me and everyone that I'd end up dating one of them. I know that I swore I never would, ever.. I promised myself I wouldn't.. but promises have to be broken sometimes.

At least, I tried to keep it.

Shortly before Jesse announced that he was leaving, it wasn’t much of a surprise.. to me at least. He’d been looking to move onto different things for a while, pave his own way into the world. I don’t blame him for not wanting to always be shadowed by me. I’ve always feared that I’d lose all the guys, these few people that have touched my heart and gotten so close to me and felt almost like family and to part with them would be terrible… but when mark left, I barely got to know him and he was making his way out. I heard he’s doing ok, and when Jesse was leaving..

I didn’t feel sad, there were not tears shed.

I didn’t feel anything. I didn't feel like I'd lost apart of me, I know with Evan I would.. I wouldn't know how to feel.

Jesse and I managed to keep our relationship from everyone, most people were sunk in so deep to the idea that me and Evan were dating. I guess, we give off that vibe because we’re best friends, these two inseparable people. On stage there's this natuarl chemistry that soars through us, to be honest. It feels amazing, I always tingel when he throws those pricesless smiles and stares at me. I wonder if there's anything in them or if it's just for show. I should now him better than that though. I can understand that people are tired of buying we’re just best friends line. But we are, I know that and that’s all that matters. I have Evan, they don’t.

<span style='color:Purple'>"Dream of better lives the kind which never hate. Dropped in the state of imaginary grace
I made a pilgrimage to save this human race, Never comprehending a race that long gone by.

I'll stop the world and melt with you"

I’ve spotted a small café and I’m hungry, I’m gonna have to drag Evans ass over there. I tug at his shirt and my eyes stare over at the café, and he knows his little Avril’s hungry. I take his hand and drag him behind me.

“So, what you gonna get us Av?” Evan’s voice came. It fluttered around me. I loved the caring tone it carried with him. His smile, Evan’s smile..is adorable, and he smiles that way it’s like he never stops.

“Me? Be a gentleman Ev” My bottom lip slips in pouting form, and I bring out those puppy dog eyes. It get’s him everytime.

“Stop that” He pulls his eyes away, so he doesn’t have to fall into my little trap, but he will.

“Stop what?” I love playing dumb with him.

I softly sigh after he fails to reply. “Well, if that’s how much you love me” My face saddens, I feel upset.

His eyes turn worried, the guilt pours from him, his hand place themselves onto mine.

“I love you Av, please don’t think otherwise” The concern forms in his throat, falling into his words.

I love f*cking with him, what else is a girl to do.. if she doesn’t get her way?”

I wonder if he’s noticed the grin on my face that I can’t keep down.

“Av, I hate you” well, he’s noticed it now. I’m not good at hiding it from him.

“Aw, I’m sorry Ev.. your just too cute when your all worried” Now I know it’s his turn to be stubborn and get back at me.

"You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
There's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you

The future's open wide, I'll stop the world and melt with you"

He sits back and stares at the floor, pretending to feel hurt and angry with me.. but I know him better than that, he’s dying to laugh and speak to me. It’s hard for him to ignore me, we’ve got so much built between us. My eyes won’t leave him, because I know it will make it harder for him to keep his turned away. I’ll wait until he can’t handle it anymore. Any moment now and those blue eyes will fall back into mine. Those oceans carrying me away.

“Ugh, I can’t stay mad at you for a single second. Fine, you get you’re way” My smile widens, he always gives me what I want. I’ll make it up to him later.. I’ll show him that I care just as much.

I hand him over some money but he pushes it back into my hand.

“I though you wanted me to be a gentleman, Av” He shoots me that same old smile but it makes me weak every time.

I've seen some changes but it's getting better all the time
There's nothing you and I won't do, I'll stop the world and melt with you

Within a few seconds he’s over at the counter, my hands tucked into my lap. I look over at him, he’s the only interesting thing in here. The only thing work devoting my time too. I stare at him, watching him… knowing that I mean the world to him and he means the world to me. I wouldn’t want to not know him, I wouldn’t want to have to be without my best friend, ever. I hate it when I let myself fall into thoughts of what might happen, that what if he ends up leaving the band or if we end up growing apart. I’ve dreaded that the whole time I’ve known him and it hasn’t happened yet. If anything our friendships rock solid.

I’d carve my heart out for him, just so he always has apart of me. I won’t forget him, when he’s been one of the biggest and most important aspects in my life. I never thought I could find something this special, not with a guy, not without there being hurt, hate, pain, tears and all that garbage. With me and Evan, we’re skating on ice, so smoothly, sure there’s little cracks here and there but we’re no where near close to slipping through.

"The future's open wide, I'll stop the world and melt with you"

I hear Evan’s voice repeatly calling me, I get so wrapped up in dreams and thoughts that it takes a while to knock me back down to earth.

“Av, snap out of it” His blue eyes meet mine, those oceans so calm and delicate. Sunshine streams into them their like him, the epitome of perfection. His heart never closes to me. It’s always open to give me a piece of it. He keeps mine safe, he’s mended me in so many ways. So many.

Evan pushes the latte towards me, I smile and stare down at it, my eyes tracing the heat as it disperses into the open air. I place it to my lips, and take a ship. As soon as I do, my throat burns soar.

“f*ck” I shout, loud enough to wake the dead.

“Av, be carefull” His hand spreads across my lip and he wipes it gently.

“I will next time, mister”

I wrinkle my nose and get myself up. Grabbing a hold of my stuff, looking at Evan. Letting him know, I want to get out of here. We finish up and head outside... but I wasn’t expecting anything to happen other than our day to continue as planned, to hang out and enjoy each others company. Today was our first 24 hours off for a while and I wanted to enjoy each moment with my best friend. So far, so good.

As Evan takes hold of my hand and wraps it neatly inside of his, thats when my eyes fall onto something else, or rather someone else. </span>

<span style='color:purple'>"There's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you"</span>

[color=pink]Lyrics: *Saves The Day* // Melt With You

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Hope it's ok.

[derycksmyhero]

Awww that was incredible! It was f*cking awesome, you've gotta continue soon...I wonder who this "someone else" is...

[TelescopeEyes]

Aww, thanks alot. I'm glad you liked it. I'll get more up soon.

[Bebe]

HOLY f*ck MAN! that was incredible!!! i hope there's a sex scene... i wonder who that person is. great job!

[TelescopeEyes]

Lmfao, Shall I put one in just for you? lol. Thanks, Bebe! Glad you liked it.

[Just_Me]

aww that was soo cute! I loved it!

WRITE MORE lol :D

[TelescopeEyes]

lol, thanks. I'm writing more.

[Elaine]

YAY that was freakin awesome ... More please!!!

[KingJJP]

brill lisa juso so f*cking brill i love it

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, thanks Elaine.. I've nearly done the next part!

Thanks, JJP.

[what_ever]

that was awsome!

can't wait for more

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks!

[whitney_m]

OH! This was good Lisa!! Can't wait for more!

[TelescopeEyes]

^ Thanks, Whit!

I just wrote it, hope you guys like it.

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Chapter 2 - *Leave me trembling*

My mouth falls wide open, and my eyes growing wider. I felt my heart race, I could almost here it. Why the f*ck was some guy, making me feel like this? I notice then that Evan’s standing beside this guy, shaking hands. I don’t even know who the heck he is, but wow, he’s gorgeous. Why is Evan shaking his hand? Does he even know this guy? I can’t stop staring. I’m not this boy crazy. Then Evan pulls me away fro it all as his hand falls in front of me face. I just about notice it.

“Hey, Av when you’ve got a minute, this is Jason” I look up at him, and then directly at this Jason guy…

I try to force myself to say hi, but my throat won’t let anything come out. What if I say something stupid? I know, I will. Evan gives me a hard look, he either thinks I’m being rude or just weird with this guy. I look at Evan, leaving Jason standing there with his hand held out patiently. Who is he? I can ask myself all this questions a thousand times, but I won't get an answer. Why did we have to bump into him? I hate it that I feel drawn to him. I don't need a guy right now, when I was just rid of burying me and Jesse and everything. What am I waiting for? all I've gotta do is shake his god damn hand.. he's just a guy. Just like Evan.Shake his damn hand. I take my hands from my pocket and reach it into his.

“Nice to meet you” He smiles, keeping it short and sweet.

Finally I gather the words together.

“Yea, you too.. so you know Evan” What kind of question was that? Of course he knows Evan “Well of course you do but..” I smile nervously, hoping I can just swallow my words.

“Evan, never told you about me then I take it” He shoots a look at Evan and Evan just smiles, his hands folding it his pocket. I realise that I’m still holding onto Jason’s hand. His grasp his so soft and gentle. I should I let go, or wait for him too. We both look down at our hands, and pull apart slowly.

“So, what are you guys up to?” he asks, wow his voice.. just has that edge to it.
I want to say something but Evan cuts in. Why now of all times? He already knows this guy. Why can’t I get to know him?. I know I've just broke up with Jesse and haven't had the best luck with guys, but I just can't stop myself. I'm suprised that I've held myself back from Evan. Only under the influence of alchohol, have I ever even thought about Evan in any other way.

“We’ve got the day of, in what seems forever.. so we’re just hanging out for the day.” Evan replies.

“Like a proper couple” Jason breaks a smile, and slightly laughs. I don’t find it all that funny. Me and Evan are not a couple, but everyone thinks it. Even this guy. I immediately find myself cutting in, wanting to make clear.. Evan and me are not dating.

“We’re not dating, we’re friends” I sharply say. I didn't mean to sound that pissed off.

“I know, I was just kidding” He still managed to smile at me.

Relax Av, I thought to myself. I should be used to this by now. Evan this and Avril that. It gets old fast, I'm sick of it.

“She always gets like this, it’s a girl thing” Evan blurts out. I didn't expect that from him. Then they both laughed in tune, Evan making me out to be some stupid girl, infront of this guy. Some f*cking friend. I’m not mad at him, not with that damn smile and those eyes and everything about him. He just didn't have to say that, I don't know why I care though, it's only Evan and some Guy I don't even know. If Evan wants to show me up, then I guess I'll give him a taste of his own medicine. See how he likes being shown up.

“Ignore him.. he’s been deprived from a sex life for almost two years” There’s my satisfaction, Jason politely laughing along with me. Evan left with his mouth open.. Not believing I just said that. Well, he gets what he deserves. We all do.

“Well, he does look like he’s been starved from something, losing your touch these days Ev?” Jason says, still laughing. Now the tables have turned. Evan doesn’t give a pleasant look back at Jason. For some reason I’m interested in Evan’s past, maybe I feel it’s a way of getting closer to Evan. I only know what I’ve seen over the two years but I’m not his life, I’ve only just gotten into it. Maybe Jason would know so many things that I don't know, seeing as they have a past. I can see in the way they approach each other and stare, that they have a past. That thier not just recent friends.
I then feel Evan place his hand on my shoulder. Maybe he can sense that I’m drawn to this Jason Guy. He seems somewhat mysterious. What, With his jet black hair, his lip ring falling to place, his sharp strong features… I’m still trying to take him all in, piecing every detail that holds him together.

“Well, we best be off Av” Evan says in a frustrated tone. He can give it but he can’t take it.

I don’t want to go, this can’t be it. I’ve just met this guy and now we have to leave it like this. I want Jason to come with us, hoping Evan will ask him to tag along but he hasn’t. How can I get him too? It would be weird and stupid if I was to just blurt out for him to hang out with us, it would seem desperate or obvious that I wanted him to stay for me. I have to say something, anything. I know that I won't ever probably see this guy again, but I know I want too.

“Where are you heading Jason?” My eyes begging him to say nowhere.

“Uh, well I’m going out tonight, there’s this party. Speaking of which, Why don’t you guys come along.. seeing as it’s your day off in as you say “forever” Jason looks at me, offering another smile.. as if it's only my answer he's looking for. I’m laced in smiles, If I go I’ll get to see him again, but just when I want to say I’d loved to go, Evan the ever typical Evan cuts in, again. Making f*cking damn decisions for me.

“I think we’ll pass, tonight” Evan breaks in. Pass? is he crazy? We have to go, I want to go.

“Alright, well if you change your minds.. give me a call or whatever” He pulled out his cell phone and handed it over to Evan. I stood there and waited.

“I better make myself scarce” he looks towards me and places out his hand again. “Nice to finally met you Av, maybe this time I won’t let your hand go so easily”

next time? That means he’s hoping for a next time?

“I guess, we’ll call you then” I say, knowing that that's exactly what I'm going to make Evan do. We're going. End of story.. even if Evan doesn't I want too.

“Yea, I hope so”

He gives one last smile and turns away. I turn straight towards Evan, whos standing there staring at the ground. Jason long out of sight now.

“Evan, why did you say we weren’t gonna go.. I mean you don’t have to but I wanna get out?”

“I don’t feel like that’s all”

“Well, don’t make damn decisions for me, I want to go.. you should go too”

“You don’t understand, look Jason and me go way back and stuff”

“Well you seemed happy enough to see him”

“I did?” He sighed. What's that supposed to mean. Why won't he let me read him?

<span style='color:purple'>"We drive tonight and you are by my side. We're talking about our lives, like we've known each other forever."

We said nothing more until we got back to the hotel, our day out was getting cut short, Evan said he didn’t feel to good. He was lying. There was something up. I didn’t want to go to this party without Evan, but I wanted to see Jason again. Well, screw Evan. I’m gonna go.. but hopefully I can talk him around before I go. I walk over to the phone in my room, Evan’s in his room. He normally sits his ass in here but apparently he doesn’t feel too good. That came on quick. Well whatevers up with him, he’s doesn’t want to share it with me. I hate it when he does that, builds up this wall. Normally I can break it down and he'll talk to me...I just don't see what happend between leaving the cafe to getting back to the hotel. Well, I need to get Jason's number of him.. god I whish Evan would go, so then he could call him.

"The time flies by, with the sound of your voice. its close to paradise, with the end surely near. If I could only stop the car and hold onto you, and never let go...i'll never let go."

I knock upon Evan's door and shortly after he answers. He swings open the door and stares at me for a moment. He looks at me differently, not the way he usually does. There's something hiding in those eyes. Or maybe it's just me.

"As we round the corner to your house you turned to me and said, "i'll be going through withdrawl of you for this one night we have spent." and, i want to speak these words but I guess...

I'll just bite my tongue, and accept "someday, somehow" as the words that we'll hang from."

"What's up Av?"

I walk inside and sit myself on the sofa. "Look Ev, this is one day of in forever. I want to go tonight... but I want you to come with me too" I don't want to beg. Why doesn't he just say yes already.

"Look Av, I know you probably have the hotts for Jason. What girl hasn't... but you don't know him like I do.. and I just don't feel like going. I don't think you should either"

"He's your friend, and I don't have the hotts for him. I just want to get out and have fun. What's wrong with that grandpa?"

"Forget it, do what you want then." His tone raised and slighlty angrier than usual. "Oh, I supposed you'll be needing this" He hands me over his phone. I take it and stare back at him.

"Please, change your mind Ev" I don't know whats up with him all of a sudden.

"And I... don't want to speak these words.
cause i, don't want to make things anyworse."

Before I can say anything else, Evan walks towards me. A certain fire in his eyes. "What will it take to make you stay here tonight with me... Instead of going out to some dumb party?"

"I uh, look..why stay in here when you can come out with me?" Why doesn't he just come? god he's being hard work.

"You didn't answer my question" His eyes won't let me leave his stare. I don't know what to expect.

"Will this do?" As soon as he said that, his lips were burning up against mine. I then realised that his lips were against mine and his hands were placed on my waist. He's kissing me? what the hells he doing that for? I wanted to stop him. He's mine best friend.. we shouldn't be doing this, he shouldnt even have thought of doing this, but it doesn't stop it feeling so right.

"Why does tonite, have to end? why don't we hit restart, and pause it at our favorite parts. we'll skip the goodbyes."

I've always wanted to know what it would be like to taste Evan, breath him in and now here's my chance to.. his hands reaching under my top. I have to stop this. This isn't Evan, this isn't him ata ll. I can't seem to stop myself from kissing him back, but I pull away, I can't do this. Not with Evan of all people. I don't even know why he's doing it. His face drops, and his ocean eyes fade.

Things feel awkward, none of us saying anything, barely breathing.

"If I had it my way,
I'd turn the car around and runaway,
just you and I."

I then speak, saying the only thing I can think of.. "I take it you're not coming then."

I turn and walk out of the room, looking back to find him slowly closing the door.

I walk back into my room and stand against the door, placing my hand against my head. What the f*ck just happend? I say to myself, wiping the taste Evan left of my lips.

"And I... don't want to speak these words.
cause I, don't want to make things anyworse."

Lyrics: *Matchbook Romance* // Tiger Lilly

</span>

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Hope you liked it, though it sucks.

[Open Your Eyes]

Oooh! Great job so far, Lisa! I can't wait for more!

[what_ever]

amazing.

I need more

lol

[KingJJP]

lisa man your so great at writeing i cant belive your not a english major

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, thanks you guys. Lmao, I feel all typed out now.

[KingJJP]

i love your writeing

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks, I'll try and get more up shortly.

[KingJJP]

great dont hurt your fingers

[derycksmyhero]

Holy f*ck that was great! I hope to see more soon!

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, thanks. Glad you liked it!

[Elaine]

wow amazing!! I NEED MORE!

[TelescopeEyes]

Soon, Elaine!

[ninny_23]

Wow, that's great. PUT AV AND EV TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!

[FallingDown]

Great chapters, Lisa!

[Dee]

I love it. It was so incredible.

All I could think of was that Avril should go back to Evan and not to that party.

[Bebe]

holy moly the second chapter was awesome!!!

(you should add an avril/evan sex scene lmfao.)

[TelescopeEyes]

Lmfao Bebe.. I'm gonna have to think about that.. just for you now. Glad you liked it!

[Bebe]

yay!! thanks!!

and i loved it!

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, lol thanks! I wonder where to fit that scene in...

[mattylover]

i like it a lot i wish i could write about AVirl and Evan liek u d it rock so much it to gd 4 worlds

[Artemis]

Fit the scene into the next chapter roflmfao. Anyways, I just caught up. I'm so sad you haven't put the next chapter up. I'm blown away by your writing. It's so much better. I awwed when Evan kissed Avril and I had this huge grin on my face lmao. Post more soon!

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, hell thanks Meg! I don't see how my writing blows you away but I'm glad that you like it! I'll have more up soon. I just have some evaluation to do and whatnot first.

[Muqaddas_Farishta]

It's amazing! I love your writing. More soon, please!!

[KingJJP]

come on get on the next chapter lisa please

[TelescopeEyes]

I'm working on it.

[KingJJP]

ya i cant wait

[TelescopeEyes]

Chapter 3 - *In words we whisper*

He didn’t just kiss me, he can’t have. That can’t have been Evans lips on mine, but f*ck it was… I. That can’t have happened.. but who the hell am I kidding, he grabbed me and kissed me.. but why? What the hell made him do that? I just need a moment to recall what just went on. I want to know what the hell happened back there. He’d never done that before, not even come close to trying. I want some answers, but I can’t go back to see him. Maybe I should drag this up tomorrow, or try to forget it, maybe he just wants to forget it too. I need to forget this, I won't bring this up.. unless Evan does, even though I want to know why he did that. I have to admit, he's a damn good kisser, especially taking me by surprise like that. Ugh, I shouldn't even have enjoyed that, not with Evan. It should have tasted wrong, but it didn't. For a moment I wanted to stay but all I could do was just leave him there and run away. I feel stupid for that, but what other choice did I have.

I stare down at the phone in my hand. I'm dying to call Jason, but I can't stop myself wanting to go back to Evan.. even though it might be best if I didn't. If I forget it and just get ready for this party. Jason would be a good distraction from this.

Just forget about what happened Av and go to the party.

Why is Evan so against going? I hate it that he won't come with me, but maybe he shouldn't now anyway. We both might feel awkward and weird with each other. That would be the worst thing.
I should call Jason, let him know I'm coming. Apart of me wants to go back to Evans room maybe even finish where we left off.. but that's not going to happen. That can't.

It's the party or nothing.

<span style='color:purple'>"Close your eyes, and i will be swimming. Lullaby's fill your room, and i will be singing.. singing to only you
dont forget ill hold your head watch the night sky fading red"

I walk into the bathroom. My eyes falling into the mirror. What would Evan or anyone seen in me anyway? I don't want to dress normally; I want to dress up a little. It's not like me but Evan's actions weren't like him either. God, it bugs the f*ck out of me why Evan pressed his lips against mine, his hand under my shirt, it was the quickest yet warmest feeling, ever. It wasn't Evan's normal touch, when he held me hand or hugged me. It was different, I can't explain it. It was over so quick anyway. Maybe I'm not meant to find out what that feeling's really like.

I’ll just fix myself up and then call Jason. That’s what I’m gonna do.. weather Evan likes it or not. Why should he have a problem with me being so drawn to Jason for anyway? I know he’s only looking out for me, like he always does. Warning me off from this Jason guy, but what harm can hanging out at a party do? I’m just going to let my hair down. What’s so bad about that?

If Evan wants to sulk in his room and lock himself away in there. Then so be it.

"But as you sleep, and noone is listening I will lift you off your feet, ill keep you from sinking"

I turn the tap water on, watching the water spray through, placing my hands under it. God, thats cold. I look up in the mirror, I look like crap but I can’t look that bad if Evan wanted to kiss me. It feels weird thinking that, that Evan kissed me.. of all people.

I leave the bathroom, switching of the light and continue to get ready. I’ve made my mind up. I’m going to call Jason, seeing as Evan won’t. I’ll tell him that I’m going.

I push open the door leading to the bedroom. It’s a mess but I don’t care… someone will come clear it up, if not it will be down to be. I’m such a clean freak on times.
I search around in my suitcase and the draws, It takes me forever to find the outfit that I want the one I hope will catch Jason’s eye. This is so stupid, I shouldn’t be trying this hard, not for a guy… but this is what I’m like. Well, not always.

I stand in front of the mirror, examining myself. Only I don’t approve.. but it’s not me that I’m trying to impress. Why the hell am I trying to impress some guy for anyway? I look away, this will have to do.

Don't you wake up yet, cause soon ill be leaving you
soon ill be leaving you, but you won't be leaving me

It’s time to call Jason. My stomachs feeling all light and weird. It’s just a guy, a voice on the end of the phone, but god what a voice. I’m so tempted to get changed and forget this whole thing.. but I want to go, and if I don’t Evan will be getting his way because he doesn’t want me to go, warning me off that way. Who does he think he is? My dad?. No, he’s not.. I’m going. End of story.. I’m going to pick up the damn phone and call if it’s the last thing I ever do.

I can make decisions for myself. I can go out and have a good time, even if I know Evan doesn’t approve. I’d like to know the hell why he doesn’t. I know I want to forget what happened with us in his room but I can’t forget that. I’m stupid to think I could. We’ll talk about it, I don’t care when we have too. He needs to explain himself and it’s probably all he’s thought about since I left his room, so at least me being out of the way will give him chance to figure out what to say to me.

There’s no avoiding it.

I breath in deeply, I’m ready there’s just one thing left to do. Call Jason. It’s so simple yet so hard, but one phone call shouldn’t be. My fingers are at the ready, if I’m not careful I’ll talk myself out of this.
I throw the phone onto the bed, I can’t call him. I walk around to the other side and it’s lying there staring at me. I sit down and pick it up.

That’s it, now call him.

I press the phone to me ear, listening to the rining banging through my ears. What’s taking him so long to answer, maybe it’s best if he doesn’t. I should hang up.

"In the car, the radio leaves me searching for your star
a constellation of frustration driving home
singing my thoughts back to me, and watching heartache on TV"

"Hello?" Shit, it's to late to hang up now.

I slightly breath and answer. "Uh, Hey, Jason... it's uh Avril"

"Hey, glad you called, I thought you guys were'nt planning on coming?" He sounds happy enough to hear my voice on the other end.

"Well, Evan's not up to it but I fancy getting out"

"He never was one to let his hair down.. I'm glad you're coming... Do you want me to come pick you up?"

"Well, you don't know where I'm staying or anything"

"I'll find you."

The biggest smile on my face is creeping through. He wants to come pick me up?.. Maybe I should just make my own way there.

"You don't have to, I can get there"

"No question about it, I'll come pick you up and maybe Mr. no fun will come along too"

Great, he wants to drag Evan along. I really don't think that would work. It would be awkward I don't want to face Evan until at least in the morning. I want to leave all that alone for now.

"I doubt he will, ok.. well see you later then"

"Yea, bye" He hangs up. Typical..

Ok, I have to be completely ready for him. I'll just wait. I hope he turns up.. I hate being kept waiting. He will come.. won’t he, but he never promised.. like guys keep promises anyway.

"But as you sleep, and no one is listening
I will lift you off your feet, i'll keep you from sinking"

My head turns to the door and the sound of someone knocking enters the room. This must be him, I hope so. I get myself up, looking into the mirror, brushing myself down. I stand behind the door and let it fall open. My eyes hang in disappointment; it’s not Jason It’s Evan.

"Don't you wake up yet, cause soon i'll be leaving you, soon i'll be leaving you
but you won't be leaving me"

“Sorry, I guess you weren’t expecting me” He’s not wearing that smile of his. I don’t want him to feel bad about kissing me like that. It just surprised me more than anything.

“I’m waiting for Jason, did you want something?”

His eyes seek no approval. He looks sad...

"Don't forget i'll hold your head, watch the night sky fading red"

“Uh No, it can wait. I wouldn’t want to keep you anyway” He starts to turn away from me. Is it wrong for me to want him to kiss me again?

He doesn’t seem very happy. I should be the one to talk with him and cheer him up but that would mean missing out on Jason. It will be ok if just this once, I was a little late coming to his aid. Maybe all he wanted was to apologise about kissing me before, I hope he knows he's already forgiven for that.. I don't want him hung up on it and feeling bad about himself.

I can't leave him like this, can I? I'm gonna have to talk to him.. maybe even if it means missing the party or running late.

"But as you sleep, and no one is listening.. I will lift you off your feet, i'll keep you from sinking"

"Ev, wait"

He turns to face me, his hand on the door. His eyes full of confusion.

"For what?"

"For me"

"Don't you wake up yet, cause soon i'll be leaving you
soon i'll be leaving you, but you won't be leaving me"

Lyrics: *Something Corporate* // As You Sleep

</span>

[what_ever]

amazing.

Please post more soon.
I need more.
lol

[derycksmyhero]

Holy f*ck that was awesome! This is addicting, more soon!

[ninny_23]

Awwww, SEX SCENE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmfao, Nancy. Awww... that was great, Lisa! Can't wait for more!

[Artemis]

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW LISA!! The ending part was the best!! aww f*cking hell that was my favorite piece in the chapter!! I loved all the rest though of course lol.

[ninny_23]

lol Sure Meggy ;) I loved the extra bit too. I finished reading it and then I posted a reply of course, but you posted more and I awwwwwed like never before. Well today anyway.

[KingJJP]

lisa great work i love it

[TelescopeEyes]

Lmao, Aww hell thanks guys! lol Nancy, I never meant to post the story untill I added the end but my computer f*cked up and it posted, only I didn't realise and I had replies already..

I wasn't planning on that ending lol It just came out of the blue. Lol, Meg.. glad to make you awww.

[Dee]

I loved it. I can't wait to read the next chapter. What will they say to each other etc...

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks, Dee!

[Crystal]

Oooooh! Amazing ending. That last line was so cute. Aw!

[TelescopeEyes]

lol, Thanks Crys!

[AvrilandEvan22]

AWWWWWWWWWWWWW OMFG LISA!!!!!! I just read it all..awwwwwwwwww. Poor Ev...awww...the end was so cute, I agree. GAH!!!! Avril's like blind lmfao.

[mattylover]

Amazing amazing it so good i hope they get together in the end and she end up eather goig wiht Ev ot the party or staying wiht Ev and not goig more i need more

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks Kirsten, glad you liked it lol.

Thanks MattyLover!

[KingJJP]

like i said i loved it its not as long as i was hoping it would be but i love it

[TelescopeEyes]

lol, ok.. thanks!

[infamous]

Lisa, this is f*cking brilliant ....I love it!!!!!!
Can't wait for more

*struts out*

[TelescopeEyes]

Well I do try Aww! lol Glad you liked it!

You need to work on that strut..

[ninny_23]

I can't wait until the next chapter!

[TelescopeEyes]

It's 9:00 a.m. I don't start college until 10, so I've made a start on the next chapter. Hopefully I can have it up tonight!

I've managed to finish the chapter almost within that hour, it will be up tonight!

[TelescopeEyes]

Sorry if this chapter sucks, but I had the urge to write it this morning because I had ideas for the chapter etc.. I've only worked on it for an hour or so. Hope you like it!

Chapter 4 // *We're breathing*

Evan nodded his eyes accepting me.. I thought he might have turned me away but he didn't. I follow him on into his room. I don't know what I'm going to say but he's my best friend I want to know whats up with him. I need to know. How can I help him otherwise? If I miss the party or Jason has to wait, then so be it. If my best friend needs me then he's going to get me. This time I'm doing the mending.. even though he may not even be broken.

We step into his room and he closes the door softly behind us and he makes his way over to the cupboard. I let my eyes follow him before sitting myself on the sofa. My hands on my knees. I feel weird all of a sudden. Evan's become too quiet, hell even I have. I want to be the one to break the silence that's creeped its way inside the room. Painting this awkwardness around us.

I'll just have to break it, if he won't.

<span style='color:purple'>”Everything I'm saying is coming out all wrong,
Please bear with me”

"Ev, are you ok?" He doesn't turn around or move an inch, his heads buried in the cupboard. He's trying to avoid looking at me, even speaking to me. What the hell is up with him? I don't get it.. one secound we're having fun and hanging out and we're all smiles and the next it's like someone's died. Evans bad mood is becoming my bad mood. I want to know whats wrong or whatevers bugging him. My eyes stick fast on the clock, he better not be this way for long. I want to go to that party, but that will have to wait.. Evans more important. If he's being this way just to prevent me from going though, he's not going to get it. God, I just want to know why that smile of his that barely washes away, the one that you couldn't remove even if it killed you to try. I want to f*cking know, now.. today this f*cking second.

but that's not all I want to know. If he doesn't want to talk about it then...

Tough.

He has too. He should know that I wont let things rest with him when he's not himself. Hell He kissed me that's not being himself.

I take myself back to earlier, it feels like it's happening all over again. It's like I can taste Evan on me still, like it's stained. My eyes are half closed and my minds tunneling back to when he just grabbed me and kissed me.

I had no warning, no clue that he was going to take my breath away like that... but I didn't have time to realise what really went on. It was over quick enough, even though that's the way it should be.. over so fast, I can't help but wonder if it should have been longer, if I shouldn't have pulled apart.. but what the f*ck am I thinking. Evan's my bestfriend and now this Jason guys on the scene.. He's my distraction.

Anyway, Evan didn't really mean that kiss. Did he? I don't know.. I really whish that I did. Apart of me hopes that when we talk about it that he'll apologise and say he didn't mean it and it was a mistake but to hear him say that kissing me like that was a mistake.. would hurt. I don't know why but I want to hear that but on the other hand.. I want to hear so much more. That maybe it meant something to apart of him. That he wasn't just kissing me for the sake of it, just because I was there for him to take.

“I've got so much to say. Let me explain myself to you”

I look up at him, up at my bestfriend... there he goes building up those walls again. At least his head isn't buried in the cupboard anylonger. Even though the back of him, is a nice site. I'd rather see those ocean eyes. I want them to tell me so much. Take me away.. not leaving me behind.

"So, what am I waiting for?" He finally bothers to breath words into the air and thats all he has to say. I hate him doing this. To me of all people. I asked him to wait, not just for anyone but for me.

“Forgive me, forgive me not.. I'm sorry for what it's worth, I know I'm wrong”

"It's more like, what am I waiting for" I stare at him harshly. I don't want to feel mad at him but he's making it hard not to. Instead of talking about whats wrong.. he's acting like this. He knows why I'm here, he's not shuttin me out that easily.

"There's nothing for you to wait for, why aren't you at that party already. Jason not bothered to pick you up?"

"Oh, I get it"

"Get what?"

"You're having a pout because I'm doing something you don't like the idea of very much. I don't see why you have a problem with it... and for your information Jason's on his way."

"Do what you want, why let me stop you?"

"I'm not letting you stop me, I'm going to go." I fold my arms and stare at the ceiling.

"Then go, you wont get far sitting there"

"Typical"

"Can't you see I'm still me
Are you listening?"

"What?"

"It's just like you to be this way with me. I don't f*cking get why you're being like this with me. If there's something wrong don't take it out on me. First your kissing my face of and now your acting like a jerk with me. Just talk to me Ev." I shouldn't have let that out, I didn't mean to drag the kissing part up, I was meant to leave that out.. but while it's floating in the air, and our ears have heard it.. we might aswell talk about it.

His reaction is unusual, I thought he'd bite back but he's just quiet, dead quiet. His ocean eyes are flooding with I'm sorries and everything f*cking else, except what I want to see, what I want them to spill.

He brushes his hair back with his hand, and sits beside me.

He takes ahold of my hand. This is more like it, more like the Evan I know. The Evan that cares..


“Nothing I can say will make this right.. Just give it time”

"I'm sorry for kissing you and I'm sorry for acting up with you and most of all I'm sorry for" He stops himself and leaves go of my hand, it lays empty on my own lap... his hand isn't filling it anymore. Why the hell did he stop? Why has he shut up all of a sudden.

“Why can't I spit it out?
I need relief
Your sympathy”

I'm dying to hear him continue.. what the hell is he so sorry for?

"Ev, whats wrong.. talk to me.. ME Evan, what are you so sorry about.. forget kissing me it was a mistake right?" I don't know what it is I want to hear him say to that.. "Somethings bugging you and you're just looking out for me and everything thats why you don't want me to go to the party..."

He's still so silent. I can't even hear him breathing... I move closer taking ahold of his hand. Placing my hand on his face and turning it so his eyes are directly in mine, so he can't look away.. not this time.

"Ev, please.. tell me whats wrong.. tell me what your so sorry for"

He tries to break from my stare, but I'm not letting him. I won't not until he talks to me.. not until I'm satisfied with what he has to say.

"Forget I said anything, just go to the party"

"Forgive me, forgive me not
I'm sorry for what it's worth, I know I'm wrong
Can't you see I'm still me
Are you listening?"

"Don't you f*cking get it yet?" I raise my voice, I don't want to but it's what he's making me do.

"Get what?"

"I can't ever forget anything you say.. just tell me"

"Ok, you want to hear it? you want to hear that I'm so damn sorry.. fine, ok.. I'm sorry that I kissed you back there that I did something I never should have, I'm sorry for even thinking about wanting to even do that. I don't know why.. and I know you want to know that or need to know that.. but I haven't the answers for it. I'm sorry that I'm giving you a hard time when you just want to get out and have fun, I'm sorry for that too"

"I'm sorry for what it's worth, I know I'm wrong"

"So you didn't really mean to kiss me?"

"Yes, no.. look just know that I'm sorry about it"

"Ok then I can do that.. but there's one more thing I want to know, need to know"

"What?"

"What are you most sorry for? You never said"

His eyes are struggling to pull away. There's something he wants to say I can sense it burning up in him.

"Ev, come on"

"Nothing, I don't know what I was saying."

"Ok fine, if there's nothing else then I'll leave you to sulk by yourself" I let his eyes fall from me, giving him a chance to sit back and think. I don't want to leave without knowing what else he's so sorry for. It must be something.. I'm not buying that it's nothing at all. I won't buy that.

I'm at the door, the whole time hoping he'd stop me from going out, that he'd talk to me.. but he hasn't. It's to late for him to now.. I'm going to just go. I open the door, not caring to look back, maybe he doesn't even care enough to watch me walk out. Maybe tommorow things will be better, maybe he'll wake up and smell the f*cking roses.

There's Nothing but silence.

I pull open the door more, as I do it shuts on me, I look up to find Evan's hand on it. My smile burns inside. I was hoping he'd do that. I was beginging to think he wouldn't.

"You want to talk now?" I ask him.

"No, I just want to let you know.. I am sorry" That's it?

"Ok, you said it, I know.." I pull open the door and walk out into the hallway.

I start to walk off when Evan calls me back..

"Av, wait"

"For what?" This sound oh so familiar...

"I'm sorry for being a jerk with you.. I am, but I can never be sorry for kissing you"

What was he saying? I dont get it. but I don't want him to say anything else but that.. but he does.

"And, the thing I'm most sorry for is that I'm sorry for loving you"


[i]“Can't you see I'm still me
Are you listening?"
[i]

Loving me? why does he have to be sorry for that.. I know he loves me... but his eyes tell me different.. he can't be telling me that he loves me loves me.. actually loves me.. other than the way he already does. I can't find the words.. I just stare at him, offering nothing.

He looks at me, and gives up waiting.. "I'm sorry" he says, closing the door, leaving me standing there.

"Are you listening?"

</span>
Lyrics: *Finch* // Apologetic Theory

[Dee]

That was so great. I got so emotional reading that. I felt so sorry for them and Evan said he loved her. Awww
I don't know what to say...I loved it.

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, Thanks Dee! I'm glad you liked it, even though it wasn't to good. Aww, thanks!

[what_ever]

omg awwwwww I need more.
that was soo... omg <3

pleaseeeee wirte more soon

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, glad you liked it Jo, I'll get working on more!

BTW, I love you're sig!

[KingJJP]

damn i wish i wasnt as dumb as i am so i could write as good as you

i loved it

[infamous]

OMG LISA!!!! that chapter is f*cking amazingm i'm blown away. wow!!! post more now!

[derycksmyhero]

That was so f*cking awesome! Awww...please post more soon!!

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks guys...

I was planning on getting more up tonight, but my two year old brother had to go to hospitol and I had to go with them.

[Bebe]

aww im so sorry about that lisa. i hope he's okay! i can't wait for your chapter.

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks Bebe, he's ok. I'll get more done soon...

[Crystal]

Awww so that's why you had to go! I hope he's alright!

Great chapter, btw. You've really got me hooked!

[ninny_23]

Awww!! That's so sweet!!

SAY YOU LOVE HIM AVRIL!!!!!!!!

[TelescopeEyes]

Glad to have you hooked Crys! He's ok!

Aw, thanks Nancy!

[TelescopeEyes]

Here you go, hope you like it..

Chapter 5 - *Visions of you*


“There's a dimmer light in this room tonight. And you'll be the last one to know when it's off.”

That's it? He tells me he loves me and walks away. Just leaving me standing here without a clue. Maybe I've got it wrong, maybe he didn't mean for me to take it this way, did he? I mean, he can't love me not like that and you can't just all of a sudden fall in love with someone. It’s not the way it is.

He was sure full of surprises today.

If he was or is in love with me and that's what he just said to my face, then that means that he's been in love with me before now.. but there's no way. He can't have possibly been in love with me without it ever showing, he can't have locked up feelings like this for so long without breaking them. Only he has, today.. he kissed me he really kissed me. It wasn't any ordinary kiss or peck on the cheek. Evan was really kissing me, deeply and intensely... like he'd been starved of me and in that one single kiss, maybe he was trying to tell me so much, so much that I didn't even know.

<span style='color:purple'>“And there's a brighter sky to this dreadful night. And you and me are the first to watch it fade.”

He's sorry for loving me? What does that mean? If he is, if my best friend the one person who means more to me than anything in the world is in love with me then why is he sorry for it? Do I love him? I don't even know that. I know that I kissed him back, he didn't make me... sure, he took me by surprise and caught me off guard but you can't make someone kiss you back and mean it. You can't. Just the same way you can't take back things you've said and done.

I run my hand through my hair, messing it up.. almost completely forgetting about the party and that Jason was coming to pick me up. Do I go back to Evan? I want to knock on his door, I can't get my head around this.. I can't leave things this way.. I need to speak to him, find out what he really meant by saying.. "I'm sorry for loving you" sorry for loving me as a friend? or as more than that? I'm not sure what I want to hear. This was the last thing I was expecting to hear. I could have dreamed about this, but all the dreams in the world never prepared me for it. I never thought I'd actually have Evan standing there with those ocean blue eyes, f*ck those eyes.. Staring into me, his heart almost out of his chest telling me something, something I was not ready to hear.

“So with this brighter sky from my room tonight, I feel, down here, a little more betrayed.”

My eyes haven't left Evans door and I'm sitting against my door. If I go back to Evan's room, I'm afraid of hearing that he didn't mean to say that and I'm afraid of hearing that he did mean it and that he loves me, that I'm all he thinks about that he wants me for more than this best friend role I play for him. If he want's that what am I supposed to do? to say.. how the hell am I supposed to be left to feel?

Confused.

I'm confused, maybe even he's confused. He might have let it slip out, maybe grasping onto anything for me to stay with him and not go to this party with this Jason. He doesn't seem to like him very much but that wasn't the impression I got when we bumped into him, he was all smiles and handshakes.. or was that some false pretence and cover up. Was he hiding behind his smile? If he was I couldn't tell and if I couldn't tell that inside his smile didn't exist, how am I to know that all his other smiles were just as fake and meaningless.

“How do I get back to where I was, when you were smiling. You were smiling.”

I don't want to be the one to go to him, if he doesn't come to me then it means nothing and he meant nothing by it. I'm spinning over these thoughts, making myself freak out over something that could turn out to be entirely nothing.. but why did he have to look at me the way he did when he f*cking said it.. there were almost tears in his eyes, his voice even. I've never seen Evan in love, so I don't how he looks, how he feels or how he acts.. but maybe the way he acts with me is Evan in love.

I know sitting here staring at a f*cking empty wall is going to do nothing. Maybe I should do nothing.. I can't take my eyes of Evan's door handle, hoping that at any given moment that he'll open that door, that the handle will turn and he will appear in front of it, in front of me.. but the door stands dead, empty.

Whats he thinking? what’s he doing in there? What am I doing out here?

“You were smiling baby.”

I'm beginning to think he feels I don't care and that some dumb party is more important to me than he is, but that’s not the truth. I lov..I.. no I can't even f*cking say I love Evan to myself in my own head. Maybe its because I don't, not like that or maybe I wont let myself.

The sound of a creak of a door sends shivers through me, my eyes immediately focusing on Evans... only to be led to disappointment. Someone else was leaving their room, walking past me.. why wasn't it Evan opening his door? Doesn't he realize he can't say something like that and just leave me here, going over a thousand f*cking things. This is one time that he can't leave me or keep me in the dark. I want answers and plenty of them, I need them.. even if none of it's what I want to hear, I know it's what I need to hear.

That's it. I'll make the first move or in mine and Evan's case he already has made the first move, more than one. He kisses me and then tells me he loves me.. or at least that's all he's left me thinking that he said.

“Now there's a tempt to die under this heartless sky. We'll bid farewell without an ear to hear me.. A tempt to die, and not put up a fight. Cause no one ever wanted to end this early.”

I'm standing in front of his door, running my hands over it. My stomach churning, swishing back and forth. I feel like I've just eaten something that disagrees with my stomach, but it's not that. Why am I so scared to knock on his door, this is a routine I've done a thousand times. Rehearsed to perfection. Yet, now it seems like the hardest thing in the world to do. I breath in and out momentarily, trying to force my hand upon the handle. It's there just resting there. I won't let myself turn it, even though that’s all I want to do. I begin to turn it, hoping that he's left it open or maybe if he hasn't I can walk away and leave this for now. Any excuse and I'm looking for it. If it's not open, then I'm not welcome.. not right now and if it's open then maybe he's been waiting, hoping that I wouldn't go.. that I'd come back.

I press my hand down harder, but the door refuses to open.

It's locked..

I won't knock, he's had his chance to talk about this for now. The party it is, he's left me no other choice. I start to walk away but I want to try the door again. I place my hand back upon it but this time it won't open, but it feels as if there's something or someone preventing it from opening. It's Evan's hand.. I know it is, he's stopping me from coming in.. but why? doesn't he want to talk about this or does he regret ever saying all those things.

"I'm not sorry for kissing you Av"... he's not sorry for that, maybe he's not even really sorry for loving me.

I leave go of the handle, I won't bother anymore.

“How do I get back to where I was, when you were smiling. You were smiling.”

I make my way over to my room. I'll just wait for Jason. I'll go out and let my hair down.. I've got enough to get off my mind and a few drinks and faces will help somewhat. Just as I open my door, a hand greets mine. Not a familiar hand but one I know, I'd remember it anywhere. I took every detail of the person that hand belongs too. I turn around to face Jason, leaning over me like a tower. I like that, I'm small and I need a guy to stand over me and make me feel safe and protected, perhaps that's why Evan does it so well.

Jason's smile is burning one in me. Even though I can't take my mind of this whole thing with Evan.. a smile can't help but creep upon my face and he smiles back even more because he knows what he's doing to me.. he knows.

"You look amazing, are you ready to go?" His eyes taking me in. Breathing me in.

I take one last look over at Evans door. It's still shut fast and he's behind it. His walls are up and I can't seem to break them down this time. He won't let me in..

"Yea, I'm ready"

"What about Evan?"

I look up at Jason, I can tell he's not to concern if Evan comes or not. My eyes falling back on Evans door, I sigh and gently shake my head.

"No, not tonight, maybe another time. I guess he's got other things to do"

"Well, his loss, I'm not complaining if I get to spend more time talking to you"

Tonight, Jason will be my distraction from myself, the world and most of all Evan.

He offers out his hand to me, I stare down at it unsure if I should but despite that.. despite Evan's voice screaming inside me. I take it and he takes mine. We pour out our smiles and start walking away from my door.. leaving Evan back in his room. If only he'd have let me in, and not shut me out. My ears are so desperate to turn around and here Evan call at me, but he's not.. he hasn't and knowing him now he won't. He would have done it already. I look up at Jason as we walk outside, breathing in the air, it's cold but I'm not feeling it.

“You were smiling baby”

Jason’s a distraction or maybe he'll be more than that. I don't know, right now I don't care. All I know is I have to go back to Evan at some point and he has to face me, if not tonight then tomorrow. It's not his choice, if he didn't want me to know, he shouldn't have let those words fall from his tongue and they were not accident.. he wanted me to know, maybe even needed me too.

Jason walked over to a parked car, his I'm assuming. I find myself still standing on the other side of sparkling pavement, unaware that time and time again.. I'm letting myself drift off so far away and my thoughts always coming back to Evan, always starting and ending with him. For now Jason's the bit in the middle that doesn't make much sense.

I walk over to his car, he open the door. Just like Evan would... f*ck! Why does everything have to remind me of him all at once? Maybe Jason won't or maybe he will because.. he just will. I sit myself in the passenger seat... Jason running around the other side. I stretch over and open his side...

"Thanks, you're a proper gentleman" He said smiling.

I laughed, he knows how to make smile already. Not a bad start but then again this has Evan written all over it.

“So there's that bright light, the one that leaded me here. The one that's screaming to be noticed. The one responsible for all of this.”

Just before we drive off, I look up at the hotel, directly at Evan's window and there he is. Standing there, holding the curtains to one side. Staring down at me.. He's to far away to see clearly but I can see him and he can see me. I've never wanted him so much and I've never felt so bad about not being with him. I can almost taste his tears that from down here in the car seem so silent and lost. I have to go to the party now; I can't bail on my distraction.

But Jason's not the distraction I need or want anymore.

Was he ever?

I'm snapped from my thoughts when Jason turns on the engine, I listen to it roar, my eyes bleeding lines. Evan's still standing there, god he hasn't moved. He looks so alone.. So alone. He shouldn't feel that when his best friend’s right here.. But he shut me out, I'm not going to blame myself.. I'm not.

I look up one last time.

“So I'll take this other road, after I get up from my knees. Because I'm sick of being lied to.
And I'm afraid of where the other one leads.”

He's gone. He's not standing in that same place, in the window.. I hope to god he wasn't expecting me to go back.. I don't want him to think I don't care.. Because the truth is I've never cared so much. We'll just have to leave it until tomorrow.

He'll still be there when I wake up. Maybe even still smiling, he's not Evan without it.

“You were smiling baby.”

</span>

Lyrics: *Dead Poetic* // Dimmer Light

[what_ever]

omg poor Evan :(
I need moreeeee soonnnnn very soon LOL *addicted*

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, thanks Jo! I'll get working on more.

[KingJJP]

i love it lisa i really do great work

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks!

[MorningStar]

so I just caught up with this story and I love it, I can't wait for more.

[Crystal]

That was gorgeous! I love how quickly you post your chapters!

[infamous]

I read this earlier in computer class, and I was so blown away. Lisa, this story is genious. Your writing is so amazing.
Wow Strut!! ..this story makes me aww lol.

[TelescopeEyes]

Gorgeous? Aww, thanks crys!

Thanks, Aww.. glad you liked it!.. genious my ass!

Thanks MorningStar, glad you caught up with it!

[Dee]

I loved it. I feel so sorry for Evan but for Avril too. I hope they do talk after the party or the next day.

[Artemis]

Lisa...I'm speechless. You've left me hanging. I'm completely and totally sucked into this story! The writing is beautiful and it all just flows so nicely.

[derycksmyhero]

Awww holy f*ck this is amazing! I mean your writing is completely addicting! I hope you post more soon!

[mattylover]

wo i relly like it i need more wat happens it was really gd

[Dryve Thru Romance]

omg wow..this is awesome! i love this fanfic!!! :D and can't wait for more

[ninny_23]

Aww, the poor thing. Awww, it's just so sad.

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, thanks guys.. I'm really glad that your all liking it and still reading.

I don't mean to leave you hanging Meg lol Aww you're to nice!

[what_ever]

ahhh i thought you posted more :P lol

and yes, I love this story, im addicted

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, lol sorry to dissapoint you!

I've actually got half of the next chapter done and seeing as none of my teachers are in, I'll get it finished shortly. My dad won't let me on my computer in the house so I hope I get it posted before I get back home.

[KingJJP]

What why not how come he wont let you on YOUR computer that twat <_<

[TelescopeEyes]

He's not a twat.

Anyway, I managed to get it done before I get home.. I'm glad because otherwise I don't know when I could have posted. Hope you guys like this chapter like you have the others. Thanks for reading and commenting all of you. It means alot that you like not only the story but my writing too!

Chapter 6 - *When it isn't right*

"Tonight I'd rather be in love. Rather it was you flowing through my blood"

Why do I feel so bad all of a sudden? I haven't even done anything wrong. Have I? Am I a bad person because I've left Evan up there, in some drab hotel room whilst I'm here In Jason’s car, more like a strangers car because I barely know him and yet here I am with him.. and I've left the one person I know from inside out alone and empty.. but I haven't done that to him, I haven't made him feel that way... but at the same time I have, but it's not my fault. I tried, I wanted to go back to Evan but he didn't want that.

I never asked for him to fall in love with me or even tell me. I didn't ask for any of this but then maybe Evan never either. Maybe he wouldn't let me in and shut me out because he never asked for this and I don't know how it must be tearing him up to feel this way towards me when after all this time, we've stuck as friends.. Bestfriends... and now things are changing and have been changing. What a shock to the system. Going from a day out, the sun burning thorough our eyes.. two people inseparable because that’s just how we are.. to some f*cking gray day. It's not even raining instead Evans tears are. I can't bare to watch them fall, not over me.

I need to get out, I need to forget all this for awhile. I know there's no escaping it or forgetting it. I can't forget something like this, not when Evans involved. I hate that I can still feel him on me, because it makes it harder to realize that I'm not sure that I can face him and tell him that I can't feel the same way.. It was hard enough with Jesse and our notes broke out of tune.. so sweetly at first but it was over soon enough.

I wasn't heart broken because I wasn't in love.. he couldn't break my heart because I never gave that much away to him.

Evan could break my heart in pieces just by staring at me, because he has all of me. All my tears, my past, my dreams, everything I have or know... Evan has and knows. He knows how I mend and he knows how I break, even before I do. Nobody knows me like he does, the way he does.

<span style='color:purple'>"Scraping through my veins my everything and you cling to every thread that clings to me"

We have this special bond. I don't know how it came about or how it happened but it did. The first time he was in my presence there was something there. There always has been, there's so much there of that something that we have with each other that everyone can sense it, even when their so far away.

I turn my eyes on Jason, his hand turning up the music.. I stare at him long and hard but he hasn't noticed. His eyes to fixed on the road.. his mind floating off elsewhere, anywhere but here with me. I don't know what I'm doing here with him or why I'm going to this party. I thought I knew but I don't anymore. I don't even know where my feelings are, where they're meant to lie.. with Jason, with Evan.. even with myself. Where are they when I need them by my side most? Not here thats for sure, not anywhere.

It's not even Jason’s fault that this has all happened.. but apart of me can't help thinking it is, because maybe if we hadn't bumped into him then maybe Evan would never have kissed me and told me he loved me. He wouldn't have.. he would have put it off for as long as he could. Maybe scared of risking everything on saying one simple thing.. but then telling someone you love them and not knowing if they can ever say it back must be the hardest thing to have to face.

I'm not saying I don't love Evan as more than a friend but I don't know If I can, it doesn't matter If I would ever want to.. I just don't think I can bare what comes next. I don't want to end up creating his tears, breaking his heart and him breaking mine.. for f*ck sake that’s not how it's supposed to be or how it's going to be.

We pick the pieces up for each other we don't break them.

"I live in notes and photographs and everything I'm holding back"

Jason and Me have barley talked while we've been sitting here, driving into the night. It doesn't feel awkward with the silence, even though the music's cutting through my ears. I can't hear it, I'm blocking it out with these pattern of voices and visions in my head. I'm pleading with myself not to cry, not to feel sorry or down.. but I can't help it. It's like someone wants me to be unhappy intentionally. When what have I done to be left sat here feeling like crap? Nothing, that’s exactly f*cking it.. Nothing.

Not a damn thing.

I tried to go back to Evan, I tried but he locked the door. He left me no choice but to be here with Jason. If I didn't care so much, god if I didn't this would be so much easier to handle. Most people would think nothing of it. Looking up at him and watching his tears fall.. when he cries I cry inside to.. I can see this little girl breaking down and forming tears, gentle and soft whimpers.. beacause she can't bare to see apart of her not right. Evan is so much apart of me, so f*cking much... but I don't know what the hell to say tomorrow. I want to avoid saying anything at all, anything about this.. but I know that we have to talk about it.. but at the same time I don't and maybe even he doesn't.

"I couldn't call you if I wanted, my fingers couldn't work if they tried....they're so sore from keeping crossed and tracing over cuts on my worthless arms"

I don't know but thinking about it, leaving it play on my mind like this isn't helping one bit. My distractions not even distracting me. Maybe things will liven up once we get there. If we ever get there. It feels like we've been driving non-stop or maybe I feel like I've been thinking for forever.

"We're here" Jason’s voice appears in my ear. Snapping me back into reality. Suddenly I don't want to be here, wherever we are. Not with him.. I want to be with Evan.

The engine falls silent and the music fades out. Jason steps out of the car, opening my side and placing out his hand for me to take. Why can't that be Evans? Why can't Evan come hold me?...

I smile, with so much pretence but he'll buy that I'm fine and that we're going to have a good time.

"Now who's the gentlemen" I softly say. Letting a smile follow shortly after.

"If I said "I hated the feeling" it would be a lie"

I follow behind Jason, watching him as he greets everybody. These complete strangers to me. I don't feel welcome here, it's weird going out without Evan or Matt, Jesse, Charlie... any of them. It's sad thinking about that. I'm not so close to Charlie as I am to Matt and Evan and well Jesse too but he's long gone. He doesn't call, well not me and I don't call him. One moment he was there and I turn around and he's not. I don't want things to work out the same way with me and Evan.

What happened to the first day this all started the first day I started out.. I was barely seventeen.. so young and unaware yet prepared at the same time but I'm not prepared for everything like I thought I was. I'm not. I remember first laying eyes on the guys.. knowing at that moment that they meant nothing to me and I meant nothing to them not realizing how much we'd end up meaning to each other. Their everything, even though I hate to admit it, I miss Jesse at times even when I know I shouldn't. If we never dated if we never crossed that thin blue line, I'd be able to miss him and talk about how much I miss a friend but he's my past along with everything else that’s done and gone.

"I live in notes and photographs and everything I'm holding back"

I can't deal with Evan being gone and in my past.. I want him to be every part. I don't want him to fade from my present.

I'm scared to hell and back to tell the truth but I can't tell Evan that I might want him but I can't have him because I'm scared, way to scared of what could happen. I know he would be worth the pain and worth everything but I'm not worth that. Nothings worth ruining what we have. I don't care, I'm scared of how we're changing.. how I'm changing and how our feelings are changing.

Why does everything have to erupt and change the way things do? What can't it stay the same... just for a little longer. Why does everything have to go by so fast? Before I have a chance to let everything sink in, every star, every breath.. every little piece around me.

"But you're the words that weren't enough. You remind me of a song I used to love"

Jason's voice comes washing over me again and his hand hurling me forward.

"Come on Av, let’s get inside"

I say nothing and let him take lead. Brushing past strangers, watching them all smiles and wide eyes. Having fun acting like they don't care and everything’s fine... but nothings ever completely fine.

Jason takes me into the kitchen are and pulls open the fridge. Turning to me and offering a beer. My favorite.. now here's my second distraction. The drink and my frist and formost distraction Jason. What a combination... I guzzle it down my neck, faster than I intended... I drink untill I'm dry, until my insides cave in and my eyes can't open.

The taste of the beer slithering down my neck pours in as Jason hands me more throughout the night. I want to feel numb. Before I down another can Jason's standing in front of me, his hands I can feel upon my waist. I can almost taste his lips.. their that close. I don't hesitate, I pull him towards me, a wicked smile spreading across and our lips are locked. His tongue racing around franticly.. lust.. this is lust pure lust.

There's no meaning in this.

He wants in my pants tonight and maybe I want to let him. Anything to rid me of my thoughts. It's not like I haven't been leading him on. I don't want Evan to know that I'm doing this with Jason, I know he'd either hate me for it, which why the hell should he? or he'll be pissed.

Jason's tounge still freshly caressing my lips. His hands sliding further up my top.. I drop my beer can to the floor, bursting into laughter.

"oops"

"Forget it, someone will clear it up.. now, were where we" Jason slyly winks and moves closer towards me.

For a second my smile appears back and I'm ready to taste him again but a sick feeling cuts through me. What am I doing? this isn't really like me. I don't do this... I don't make out with just anyone this way.. I can't believe I'm thinking about sleeping with him tonight.

How the f*ck can I even think that when there's a guy all alone back up in some hotel room waiting for me not just anyone but me.. a guy waiting for me, one that loves the f*ck out of me and maybe I love him too.

I can't stop Jason just like that, whats he going to think? Will he be pissed. He just tastes all wrong... the first few seconds were drops of lust and I let myself get caught in the moment but this isn't how it was with Evan, even thought it was over to soon.. this kiss is nothing like Evans.

"I live in notes and photographs
and everything I'm holding back
but you're the words that weren't enough
you remind me of a song I used to love"

I gently pull away..

"Av" Jason looks confused as to why I've stopped.

I press my fingers against his lips. "Shhhh" I get myself away from his grasp and he turns around..

"Where are you going" His hands coming my way again... but I don't want them on me.

"The ladies room"

"Ok, don't be too long"

Don't be too long? I'll be as long as I want... I'm not going to the ladies f*cking room.. I need to get out, get air.. I need Evan. I make my through the house until I reach the front door. It's already open. I make my way outside my footing falling all over the place. This was such a bad f*cking idea. I feel like shit..

I fumble around in my jeans pocket, searching for my cell phone. I want to call Evan to come and get me and take me home.. Wherever home is I don't really know.

I pull it our and dial his number.

"I couldn't call you if I wanted, my fingers couldn't work if they tried
they're so sore from keeping crossed and tracing over cuts on my worthless arms"

It's ringing. I hope he picks up.. I need him too.

but it's still ringing, he's not picking up.

Ugh! I feel like shit, I've only had a couple of cans. I can't be that drunk already. I wipe my hand across my forehead. I feel like I'm burning up... My stomachs swimming inside, churning around. My throat ready to burn with vomit. This is just great, Evan won't pick up and I'm about to hurl.

I stare at the phone long and hard and place it back against my ear.. the ringing drilling through me.

I look infront of me and everythings blurred. I can't make anything out. I rub my eyes but everything’s still a blur.. I can barely focus.

I hold the phone harder against my ear. That’s it, f*ck him.. f*ck Evan. If he wants to be cold with me.. I'm f*cking trying but he's not. I hold my head, the pain surging through it's driving me insane and my stomach playing up isn't helping. I feel hot and sweaty even my palms have become drenched in sweat. It's not even warm out here. It's cold I'm getting shivers yet I'm sweating and feeling violently sick.. when I've only had a f*cking few beers.

Jason wouldn't have done anything to the drinks would he? No.. f*ck that thought.

The ringing of the phone ends, Evan's picked up..

"Hello?" It feels so good to hear his voice. At least he picked up..

"But you're the words that weren't enough. You remind me of a song I used to love"

Before I can answer, vomit falls from my throat.. my hand up against the wall. I try to speak back but my voice is too soar and everything’s still a blurry mess. I wipe my mouth stained with such a horrible taste.. I feel shaky... I can't even stand myself up straight.

I place the phone to my ear again.

"Avril?" Evan's voice echoing with concern.

I drop the phone to the floor, me going down along with it. Hitting on the earthy ground below, my eyes falling closed. </span>

"you remind me of a song I used to love"

Lyrics: *Jamison-Parker* // Your Song

[KingJJP]

Sorry lisa didnt mean to upset ya :(


great chapter i love it your such a great writer

[Dee]

I loved it. Now I feel so worried about Avril. I hope Jason hadn't done anything to the drinks.

I wish Evan could be with her.

[TelescopeEyes]

lol, it's ok you didn't upset me.

Thanks Dee! Glad you liked it!

I'm not sure when I can get more up because I cant use my computer at home.

[derycksmyhero]

Is it so wrong that I hate Jason? Lol, this story is so f*cking amazing as is your writing...just...I don't know, words don't do it justice.

[Evan Rocks]

^lol. i don't like him either. this story rocks!! i just read the whole thing. WOWZERS!!! it sucks you in and you can just picture everything. awesome job!!

[TelescopeEyes]

Well, I'm not sure that I want you to like Jason anyway lol

Thanks guys, I'll get up more when I can.

[KingJJP]

i wounder what will happen im really can't wait lisa

[MorningStar]

that was incredible, I loved it.

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks, glad you liked it!!

[Bebe]

aww that was great lisa!! ugh i dont like jason. i hope evan comes to rescue her! lol

[what_ever]

ahhh i wanna now what happens lol

that was awsome!

[ninny_23]

Awww, that's so sad. Go get her Evan!!

[Dryve Thru Romance]

wow ahh i need more!! i can't wait for more lol it's awesome!

[Open Your Eyes]

Holy f*ck, Lisa! That was f*cking awesome! Can't wait for more!

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks guys! I'm writing more now..

[Dryve Thru Romance]

yay!!! can not wait! :D

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw! I'll have the next part up later tonight!

[Dryve Thru Romance]

w00t!! i shall be waiting lol :P AHH! i love summer for all the fanfic catching up time i get haha sorry i'm hyper too many mello yellos!!

[TelescopeEyes]

I have a bit to finish but it shall be up tonight!

[Dryve Thru Romance]

*throws party* wooooooo hooooo!!! haha sorry for all this spamish stuff man, i've just got nothing better to do but reply to posts haha :D but yay can not wait for more

[TelescopeEyes]

Sorry that it's kinda short.. It sucks, but I hope you guys like it anyway.

-----------------------

Chapter 7 - * Tasteless Mornings *

I slowly open my eyes. Pain soaring through my head. I don't remember how it's got there but it's refusing to pass through me and go away. There's no familiar scent in the air. I dont' know where I am.. I open my eyes fully and look around me, turning to my side... blankets pulled right up over me. For a second I feel like I'm in Evans room and that he's tucked me in, but this room doesn't look familiar at all. Infact the body lying next to me is one I've never woken up to before. I rub my eyes before leaning over, he has his back turned to me and he's out cold. I lean over a little more to find that it's Jason lying next to me... but why? Why aren't I back at my hotel room, why didn't Evan come get me last night? I know I remember calling him, I remeber that but nothing f*cking else after that. I don't even remember coming into this room... why the hell is Jason lying next to me?.

<span style='color:purple'>"How did you know what I looked for, so long? And all that time, what I tried to find was wrong. You're always there every single time, even when I'm not with you."

I sit back on the back, I don't want to wake him.. even though I have so many f*cking questions for him. I pull the blankets tighter over me.. I stare at the floor and carve out each part of the room, my eyes falling back on Jason.. I notice how his top isn't on.. I look over and find my bra on the floor, I let go of the covers to find It's not on me and that, that's mine on the floor.. oh f*ck no... nothing happened last night, no.. it couldn't have.

I feel sick to the stomach.. there's no way we did anything. We can't have and if we did I don't f*cking remember any of it.. nothing. I slowly slip from under the bed covers, grabbin a hold of my bra and shirt placing it back on myself.

Jason starts to stir, I look over and he's turned to face me.. his eyes starting to break open. I'm just standing here, frozen. I want to get out of here I need too, where the f*ck is Evan? Why did he just leave me here? but it's my fault I came, he didn't make me but he didn't stop me either... what the f*ck am I saying of course he tried to stop me.. he told me he loved me, that's enough to stop my world... but he did shut me out but I didn't have to f*cking go and leave him there.. and.. what the f*ck have I gone and done? If anything did happen with me and Jason last night, what if he breaths a word to Evan about it... what if?

"But when I come around it won't take very long, to find my way to your embrace."

I place my hand upon my head, the pain picking up pace every second...

Jason stretches his arms, making a pattern on the bed.. his eyes slowly falling open and staring right at me. A smile creeping across his face and his mouth ready to form words.

"Morning beautiful" He says, his voice fresh and crisp. Morning beautiful? what the hell does that mean? waking up with a f*cking smile on his face and calling me that.. I don't know what to say... I bite my lip and step backwards, my foot falling hard onto something beneath me.. sending me falling backwards. I fall down with a thud..

great, more f*cking pain..

Jason pulls himself up from out of the bed and straight over to me, kneeling down holding out his hand to pick me up. His hand wasn't so much of a stranger but this time I didn't want to take it, I wanted it away from me. I look away from him, anything to not look him in the eye.. I can't.. not if, not if I slept with him last night.. and if we did anything does he even remember? His hand falls away, and instead of leaving me alone.. his arms are around me picking me. I feel sick at thet hough of him touching me and his hands all over me... the only hands I want or need are Evans but they're not here.

"You see in me what I could be, I try. Should it be so hard for me to love, completely? You're always there every single time, even when I'm not with you."

"Don't" I say as I move away from his grasp.

"Thats not what you were saying last night"

I feel like I want to throw up, hearing him say that.

"Whats that supposed to mean?" Why am I even bothering to ask. It can only really mean one thing.

"You don't remember?" No, I don't and he damn well knows I don't.

"No, I don't remeber anything.. I don't know why I ended up in here with you lying next to me shirtless and why my top was on the floor"

"Do the math"

"We didn't.. we couldn't have.."

"We did"

"but I remember feeling sick and calling Evan and then nothing after that.. he answered why isn't he here"

"But when I come around it won't take very long, to find my way to your embrace. I never take the time to see you in my life."

"Because he's Evan... You said you were going to the ladies room and you were gone for ages.. I looked around for you and found you passed out outside, your cell on the floor.. I took you up here to this room and you came around and started kissing me and you were all over me, I was just as drunk as you were and it happend...."

"Then why is it that only I don't remember?"

"I don't know, what are you trying to say?"

"I'm trying to say that theres no way I would have slept with you last night"

"No, because you don't lead guys on and start making moves on them because you want a goodnights sleep Av... don't accuse me of taking advantage, don't bother going there.. I could have left you outside and thought you know what f*ck her... but I didn't because I wanted to find you and I like you.. I wouldn't take advantage of anyone, especially not you..I just whish you'd remember"

"I just wanna go, just take me back" I make my way towards the bedroom door but my hand barely gets in contact with the handle when Jason's voice begs me turn around.

"No, not until you remember what happend last night. I'm not having you thinking that nothing happend or that I took advantage just because I can remember and you can't"

"I don't care, I just wanna f*cking go.. just take me back" I push down on the handle, my stomach wanting to throw up and my throat not giving up burning. I just want to get back, get to Evan. I don't feel safe here. I push down on the handle when Jason's hand pushes against it, closing it shut. I'm to afraid to look up at him. Why is he doing this? It's not my f*cking fault that I can't remember.. I just don't want it to be true.. it can't.. I can't have slept with him.. not just like that. Was I feeling that low?

"Sit down"

Sit down? what the f*ck?

"Jason, stop this and take me the f*ck home"

"I asked you to sit the f*ck down" His tone sent shivers through me.. cold. I don't like this not one bit.

Evan would never make me feel unsafe. I always know his arms I am, I home.. I'm floating so far up.

"Would there be less pain and loss? Open up my eyes and help me see. The things that you have laid in front of me."

I walk over to the bed and sit upon it. My hands in my lap and my head faced down in the blankets. I don't know him so I don't know what to expect. I thought I knew Evan yet not in a million years did I expect him to kiss me and tell me he loved me. God, I just want to get back to Evan.. I want to talk to him. I don't want to be here any longer.

"You're always there every single time, even when I'm not with you."

I stare down at the floor, my eyes tracing over to Jason, circling his feet as he walks towards me and sits beside me. My head still facing down, I'm afraid of what I might see in his eyes to look up. Why should I be so scared, when I thought he was some hot guy that I wanted to make out with.. he's right I did lead him on, I lead myself on.

"Look, I'm sorry if I've scared you. I just really like you Av and last night meant something to me even if it didn't to you"

"Jason, I don't remember. It can't have happend.. please, just take me to the hotel"

"I can't"

"What?"

"I like you, I thought you liked me and last night made me certain that you did.. but you were just f*cking with me weren't you because your some f*cking singer"

I place my hand onto his, as much as I don't want to touch him. I just want to calm him down. He grabs ahold of my arm, squeezing it hard... I let out a soft and silent whimper too quiet for him to hear.

"I'm sorry, just take me back now"

His grip losens and he lets go. I breath in with a sigh of relief.

"Ok, if thats what you want"

"Yea, it's what I want"

"But when I come around it won't take very long, to find my way to your embrace."

Without another word he puts on his top and walks me to his car. Walking past bodies lying all over the place.. the stained stale smell of beer and vomit reaching my nose.. making me feel uneasy. The sun burning through my eyes, causing me to squint.. my head not dying down from all the pounding. I just want to get back to the hotel, the sooner the better. I don't know what to say to Evan, or how the hell I'm supposed to act. I don't know if he wants to talk about it.. I don't know what he wants.

What do I want? What do I need? What did I ever expect to achieve last night, being here with Jason. He's not the guy I want at all, he didn't turn out the way I imagined. The giddy feeling he sent through me, has gone. Was it ever there? Was I just trying to hard to make myself feel something for someone else just so that I would stop myself from ever feeling anything towards Evan?..

I think I know what I want and what I have to say when I see Evan.

Only, I don't know if he'll want to hear it.

"You're always there every single time, even when I'm not with you. But when I come around it won't take very long, to find my way to your embrace."

</span>

[COLOR=pink]Lyrics: *Slick Shoes* // Always There[/COLOR

[Open Your Eyes]

HOLY f*ck LISA! f*cking hell. -bows down- Lmfao. I can't wait for more.

By the way, Slick Shoes kicks ass.

[derycksmyhero]

Dude holy f*ck! That was amazing...oh shit...but amazing!

[TelescopeEyes]

Lmfao... whilst you're bowing.. can you clean my shoes? lmao..

Aww thanks Rush and Kayla!!! Glad you guys liked it..

and yes Slick Shoes kick ass!

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmfao, Lisa. Sure. -cleans Lisa's shoes- Squeaky clean!

[TelescopeEyes]

Lmfao, Yay now my converse look clean again!

I'll have to record myself saying you cleaned my shoes.. lmao..

[FallingDown]

Awesome Chapter!

[Dee]

I loved and I don't like Jason.

I hope Evan is still at the hotel.

[what_ever]

omg,
i need more soon

amazing chapter.
I wanna know what happens

[infamous]

Omg so much suspence! I need to know what happens next!

[KingJJP]

love it as always

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks Guys.. not sure when I'll have more up.

[ninny_23]

*gasp* Avril how could you?! Jason, you buttf*ck.

[Dee]

I thought a new chapter was up...Can't wait for more.

Jo's Avatar ( Evan kissing Avril's hair, at least it looks like it) and Nancy's sig...makes me never want to leave this thread.

[infamous]

I can't wait for more!

[Dryve Thru Romance]

omg can't wait for more!!! awesome chapter! i love that song by slick shoes by the way lol

[TelescopeEyes]

I'm working on the next part, I'll have it up soon.

[what_ever]

yay, can't wait to read it :D

[Crystal]

That was awesome! Those lyrics were really pretty.

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks, glad you liked it!

[Evan Rocks]

holy shit that was awesome!! damn you jason you bastard!!! :)

[mattylover]

Jason and a$$ hole i hope eveyr thing fine wiht Ev and her and then Evan kicks Jasons ass but it was really really gd i need mroe to liveon it just so gd

[eval]

omg!! i hope, that what jason said is a lie....
your story is so good.... i can't wait for the next part!!

[Dryve Thru Romance]

ahh can't wait for more of this story!!

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks, I'll have it done soon.

[TelescopeEyes]

I see i've neglected this, I'll have it done for you as soon as I can.

[Crystal]

Lol 2 days is not really neglecting it!

[TelescopeEyes]

lol, ok then! I'm writing more.

[ninny_23]

Great, I can't wait!!

[what_ever]

when will there be more? lol

[infamous]

Can't wait for more!

[eval]

oh, when comes the next chapter?! I'm so looking forward to it!!

[Evanrocks]

Is there gonna be more to this story? It's really good I hope there is ....

[TelescopeEyes]

I just forgot about this and haven't written anything but if people still want it done... I'll write more.

[ninny_23]

I want more!! Who wouldn't? Well, except for those Evan and Avril nonorgators.

[TelescopeEyes]

lol, ok I'll try and write some more for you guys.

[Crystal]

Awsome! I can't wait.

[PaintedNails]

I just went back to read the previous chapters, and I hope you have some more up soon!

[TelescopeEyes]

I'm not sure where this storys heading right now.. but I'll try and write something.

[Dee]

Thank you for the update.

[PaintedNails]

Aww I hope you have more sometime!

[Open Your Eyes]

-cough-

[TelescopeEyes]

lmao.. damn you Rush.

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmfao. You love me. Admit it.

[TelescopeEyes]

I have nothing to admit!

*cough* I'll just wait until the thread falls all the way to page 2 *cough*

[Open Your Eyes]

Yes, you do! Lmao.

It will never fall there with me here.

[TelescopeEyes]

I admit that I love milk...

lmao, let it fall.

[Open Your Eyes]

Oh psh.

Nevah!

[TelescopeEyes]

ok.. I love Rush... *eats words*.. lmao.

I know you want the next part... I'll really try for you.

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmao. Awwww, I love Lisa.

Awww! Thankies. ^_^

[TelescopeEyes]

I just need you to refresh me on where the story was heading again.. I forgot.

I'm gonna start writing some now and tomorrow and try to get this back on track... stupid distractions.

[venus in furs]

I only read the two first parts on the first page. I've looked at almost everything that's been posted lately in this forum, and I think you're the one who writes the best. Honestly. My mom has, however, turned the radio on in the room where I am, so I've been reading your story while Etienne Daho and Eurythmics played, which made it sound pretty cool. It's also very emotional and dense, which isn't what I'm the most keen on when it comes to stories, but well.

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks for commenting, although I wouldn't say I was the one who writes best.

[venus in furs]

Of course you wouldn't. But I have read fictions from eighteen different people here, and this is clearly my feeling.

[FallingDown]

yeah.

[TelescopeEyes]

Well, I never have a high opinion of my work. I don't have the motivation or anything to continue with this story, though I'll write up something else.

[ninny_23]

That's why we give you our opinions. I guess I'll just wait until you write something else, though your writing is really great.

[TelescopeEyes]

I've made a start on the next chapter.. I guess, I could try and finish it. I'm just lazy.

Thanks, Nancy.

[venus in furs]

I do get satisfied with my own work, but only very briefly. From time to time, I'm very proud of myself for a few seconds, but never longer. As for continuing this story, I don't know what to tell you. I've never in my life finished any of the stories I've started, or only once, but I lost the competition anyway. Maybe I'll reach the end of the one I'm posting here, if there are still people to read it. God knows. I wonder whether you can write a story and make it look unified and coherent when you do it on several impulses. Talented writers probably can. It isn't my case, though.

[TelescopeEyes]

The same with me, in most cases.. I can be briefly be satisfied, then I think... it's no good and so forth. I think I'll work on something else for the time being.

I hope you finish yours or at least write it for a bit longer.

[venus in furs]

You can't force yourself to write something, anyhow, so I guess there's no other choice.

I've already written more, but I need to put it all together rightly.

[TelescopeEyes]

No, rightly so.

I'll be ready to read how it developes, from the first.

[StIcKy_nOtE15]

this is a very good story continue

[Open Your Eyes]

I love you, Lisa.

[TelescopeEyes]

I hate you, Rush... ugh! I love you too.

Now let it sink further.

[ninny_23]

Nice ass. Looks firm.

[TelescopeEyes]

Ok, quit it!

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmao Lisa. Never! :hug:

[ninny_23]

We love the story too much. I'll never let it go!!

[TelescopeEyes]

As much as I love you guys, um.. QUIT IT!! lmao.

[ninny_23]

Fine, but in ten days... I'll be back!

[Open Your Eyes]

Bumpity bump bump.

[TelescopeEyes]

ugh!

[eval]

when comes the next chapter..... i need to know what happens next... pleeeaasseee :D

[Open Your Eyes]

Lisa, I love you. :hug:

[TelescopeEyes]

I'm gonna kill you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

once, I've washed the hair. lmfao.. oh rush! ugh.

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmfao! Awwww... you're so nice.

Lmfao. Oh Lisa! :o

[TelescopeEyes]

lmfao... go hug a tree or play on the train tracks.. lmao just get out of here.

I love you :)

[Open Your Eyes]

Roflmfao. Go write another chapter. ;)

I love you, too. ^_^

[TelescopeEyes]

Make me.

[Open Your Eyes]

:o Hmph. I think I'll go off to cry now.

[TelescopeEyes]

As long as your leaving. =p

[Open Your Eyes]

Never! -cries here- :cry:

[TelescopeEyes]

Stever voice: c'mere you little shit.

lmfao.. cry in your room.

[Open Your Eyes]

Roflmfao. :hug:

Hmph!

[Open Your Eyes]

Double post if I must.

[TelescopeEyes]

Meg will kick your ass.

[Open Your Eyes]

She's done it, too!

[derycksmyhero]

She has.

[TelescopeEyes]

Get out.

[infamous]

Oh man, she's gonna kill me *bumps*

Yeah, I was bored and started to read it ... write more please :)

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmao, Chris! Yay! You're on our side!

[TelescopeEyes]

If there was a color that I could paint I'd shove the brush down your throat and wash your insides down the drain and laugh as you cryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. "oh please, I didn't mean to bump your story, the way I did"

yeah.. I'm gonna murder you f*cking whores.

[infamous]

Umm ... chill?

WRITE MORE!

[TelescopeEyes]

Chill? Chill? CHILLL? chilllllllllllllll?

Get out!

[infamous]

I don't think so. Be happy that we like you're story this much.


OMG, Rush! ..that lyric above your avatar lmao. The ryan cabrera song, "she's" ..:wub: ..it makes me so sad.

[TelescopeEyes]

Yes it's lovely jubbly that you liked it so much but I hate it! Can't you just leave it settle at the bottom?

pwease?

[infamous]

First off, its please. Damnit! Learn how to spell correctly.

And secondly no. I will not rest until you have another chapter written.

[TelescopeEyes]

I was doing that in an attempt to sound remotley cute.. but you throw it back in my face. Nice one, shithead.

Then waste your time bumping nothing. :)

[infamous]

Shithead? ..oo, so we're starting the childish 5 year old name calling. Sounds like fun!

No, I don't think this is a waste of time. Its amusing the f*ck out of me. I love you, Lisa. lmfao.

[TelescopeEyes]

You can call names as you please, no matter what age.. you f*ckass. Who said that name calling fell into certain age catagories?

This is a waste of time because you won't get a chapter out of me, my god.. months on end this has been left and you drag it up... I love you too, you b*tch.

[infamous]

Oh, humbug. Shut your pie hole and start writing. Your wasting time. Instead of arguing with us, you can be creative and start thinking of where this story will be heading.

Yeah, I think that's a good idea. Now go ..go on. Write.

[TelescopeEyes]

I'm giving you the finger, right now.

[infamous]

Oh ..ok .. well that's it. I think the finger changed everything. Shutup and write.

[TelescopeEyes]

Fine, I'll write.

[Open Your Eyes]

Originally posted by infamous@Aug 26 2004, 12:07 PM
OMG, Rush! ..that lyric above your avatar lmao. The ryan cabrera song, "she's" ..:wub: ..it makes me so sad.
Aye, it is!

Lmao. Yay, you big shit! :hug:

[TelescopeEyes]

lmao.. yeah, you'll have your chapter.

[TelescopeEyes]

As lovers go, Avril and Evan fell down a well. Made love and came back up for air.

THE END.

[Open Your Eyes]

...YOU WHORE.

[TelescopeEyes]

Aw, you liked it. Thank for commenting and reading the whole way through. I may write another story now that this one has come to it's end.

Thanks again.

[Open Your Eyes]

You big shit. Write correctly.

[TelescopeEyes]

You have a weird obsession with shit, I worry about you, I really do.

I wrote correctly!

[Open Your Eyes]

Shut it.

No. That was stupidly.

[TelescopeEyes]

Can't you bump someone else's story?

[Open Your Eyes]

Nope.

[TelescopeEyes]

Why not?

[Open Your Eyes]

Because. I'm patiently waiting for this one.

[TelescopeEyes]

Patiently wait for another.

[Open Your Eyes]

No.

[FallingDown]

What If I have a new story in my head and I just can't do this one?

Gimme a break.. pretty please?

lol rush.. that's what she'll just keep saying.

[Open Your Eyes]

Brandon, you've lost me.

[FallingDown]

just saying what she's gonna keep saying.. lmao

[TelescopeEyes]

ugh, you're bumping it up just like them.

I'm gonna have to do my plan again, aren't I?

[Open Your Eyes]

Lisa. Stop it.

Oh, I get it. Lmao.

[TelescopeEyes]

Fine.. I'm gonna do some bumping of my own.

[Open Your Eyes]

Hmph

[FallingDown]

but won't that uh be pointless.. seeing as it'll take one post to bump this back up over the others.. lmao. Poor Lisa.

[Open Your Eyes]

Lmao. Brandon is right.

[infamous]

*bump*

Lisa ..wow, that final chapter ..mind blowing. lmfao

[TelescopeEyes]

why are you bumping? you got the ending!.

[infamous]

Well one must comment on such a magnificent ending.

[Artemis]

Lisa, I don't know what to say. The last chapter...It made me cry. Such a beautiful ending.

[TelescopeEyes]

Thanks, Indiana.

[Open Your Eyes]

Lisa. :(

[TelescopeEyes]

Rush... nice to see you too.