my first writing....

[ocean]

I sat outside one afternoon
In an old rocking chair
And I watched the sun set off
For bussines West somewhere
Wile the sky turned watercolor pink
And got gold and blue
The stars all showed up one by one
while i waited for the moon

And I thought ‘bout you and I wondered why
you never even said goodbye
You shined so bright you blinded me
And left me so I couldn‘t see

I was the moon chasing the sun
you'll never know what i've b'come
No matter how fast that I would run
Just like the moon chasing the sun

As the moon peeked out of the Eastern sky
They both start up about this time each night
An evening breeze just stopped by
And brought some sweet relief
In the silver light I finally let go of the heat

And I thought ‘bout you and I wondered why
You never even said goodbye
You shined so bright you blinded me
And left me here so I couldn‘t see
Just how much you're really hurting me.

[Tiffanie]

hey thats very very good
keep up the good work

[De-Generate]

Good stuff, even more for your first writing. :D

[fooeleven]

continue,ocean

[vatjui]

Aye, good.

[luckyducky]

:yes: its very good i liked it :yes:

[MarieLove]

me likes too :yes:
great job grrl!

[ocean]

thanx! i'll post somemore! please be honest bout what you guys and grrl's think about it!
$ocean$

[Sparkplug]

its like a song :)

[ocean]

i like to write song's but i never can come up with a corus!